American Idol: The Sad State of America

Last night, millions tuned in for the first installment of series 2 of reality show #768: American Idol. The first show, which is much more “America’s Funniest Home Videos” than “America Idol,” is a crack up. It features the brutally honest Simon Cowell, the sweetheart Paula Abdul, and the smooth

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Coming Attractions

As a boy, one of my favorite parts of going to the movies was the coming attractions. As I got older and movies at home became more convenient and commonplace, I learned to appreciate trailers as one of the still unique experiences about going out to a theater. A few

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Drugs Fund Terrorists

After my last rant on the brilliant Verizon commercial, I know have to extoll the genius of the “Drugs Fund Terrorists” ads. The assertion here is that, somehow, each time your local no-good, head, or general pothead buys themselves a dime bag, Osama Bin Laden comes that much closer to

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F Prudential

Two things: I’m all moved. But the stupid f’ing property manager, Prudential Carruthers of Arlington, the jerks, flat out LIED to me this morning and stiffed me on the walk through. I took off from work and they just didn’t show up. I called, and they pretended it was another

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Peas Porridge Hot.

What the hell is porridge? And who is eating it? According to dictionary.com: porridge: por·ridge Pronunciation Key (porij) n. A soft food made by boiling oatmeal or another meal in water or milk. Where do I start? What other “meals” are there? Corn meal? How many meals might make for

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weird

Why do some people pronounce the name Cheryl, which I always hear as being pronounced Sherrull, like Shurl? That’s f’ed up, no? If my name were Cheryl, I’d say, “Excuse me, my name is Sherrull, not Shurl. Get it right, please.”

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Pepsi Blue SUCKS

Can I please just tell you: PEPSI BLUE SUCKS. God, what a horrible drink. It tastes like…nothing. My friend’s quote: “It’s like cotton candy that melted, evaporated, rained, washed through a taste-removing machine, and then was mopped up and squished out of the towel.” I couldn’t agree more, buddy.

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